A Life Journal (pt. 1)

I have been in the habit (ever since I could write) in keeping a journal. Over the span of my life so far, I noticed that I could fill quite a few large bookshelves to the brim with my thoughts and experiences. Thankfully I don’t have to ever worry about that. I actually go back to the last journal filled and tear out pages or sections that I don’t want to part with. Then I burn that journal to ash. It’s a therapy thing. I do this after I fill the current journal I have been writing in. I put what I want to keep, in a large box with the other saved memories and moments. Then go about my life as per usual until the next new journal is filled.

I wondered earlier this last year what I would actually do with all these saved moments in time. Keeping them in a box seemed a little low rent to me. Yeah, every once in a while I would need some reflection time and open this gift box to myself. Flipping through my past and pondering upon how I saw myself and the world. It is nice to have this option at my beck-and-call. However it almost seems disrespectful in a strange way. Keeping these segments in my life boxed up and stored in the back of my closet.

You can see where I’m going with this right?

So yeah. I am going to build a life journal. A collection of me, for me, that should last me until I am pushing daisies. Is this odd? I don’t know. I like the idea that I would have a tactile tome of my full past that I can grip in both my hands. Knowing that I am holding a cherished moment in time that was documented when I was 8 years old, all the way through to the present.

Obviously it is not going to have everything. But I planned out the logistics. Life changing moments, memories that sculpted my choices, ideas that blew my mind, and of course the art that I couldn’t part with. Unlike my normal journal that I write in every couple of days (and my uber planner that I keep progress on my daily activities and appointments all day long). This Life Journal would be meticulously added to once a year.

I am one of those people that likes to keep lists of stuff. I used to have a journal of every single movie I watched along with my review of it. I had one for restaurants, music, tv shows, books I’ve read, etc... Nowadays, those kinds of things are a kind of irrelevant to document in a book/planner/diary. I can access all that from my phone within seconds wherever I am. But for me, the personal stuff will stay on paper. Just doesn’t feel right to have absolutely everything digital. But that is just me.

So… I am currently writing this on Allhallows eve 2024. It won’t post until January 1st 2025. But from now until then, I will be scheduling posts on my progress with building this journal. By the time this actually posts, it might already be done. Or I might be going through some major “what the hell was I thinking” crisis. Hello fear. I am kinda worrying that I might mess up somewhere in the process and have to start all over again. Even worst, that it might happen more than once or three times.

In college I did take 3 book binding classes. They were epic fun. Even got a few hand-mades into a gallery show. But that was ages ago. Like, in 2002 I think. But I am confident I will remember how the process goes. Well, it goes fine in my head when I think about it anyway. So we shall see won’t we. I will be posting all my blunders of course.

I just went through storage yesterday and got the majority of the supplies that I will need. This morning I did kinda splurge on Amazon though. I got some, kind-of-expensive stuff. But, in my defense, this thing that I am making needs to last me for the rest of my life. So the quality has to be durable and at the same time… cool looking. I don’t want it to look like I got the materials at a craft store discount.

Do you know those old books that look like they are worth more than your life? Yeah, I am not doing anything like that. Heh,… I really hope it doesn’t suck.

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Anyway, first thing I will be doing is waiting for my “eye roll purchases” to come in.

I will gather the paper needed to make signatures (sets of pages folded together). I am foreseeing that I will need 8 signatures. Which is about 5 pages each. The total individual (one unfolded page counts as two) page count will be 80. It might sound a bit low. But I will be using thick deckle edge virgin cotton handmade water color paper. This paper gets heavy and is thick. So the journal can only be so big. Kinda defeats the purpose of a life journal if I might throw my back out carrying it. Would be morbidly funny though if I did.

Second thing is to make a template guide to punch evenly spaced holes in each page. Which will take forever. I don’t remember if I am supposed to punch the holes from the outside of the fold or the inside.

Third thing is to actually sew a waxed thread through each signature. Binding the pages together. And then repeat the process by stacking the next signature on top; and so forth.

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I will stop here. This post is getting long. Bookbinding is actually a pretty long process when doing it right. Especially when leather working is involved. Yeah, i’m binding this F’r in a dead animal skin. Don’t worry, I have no idea what I am doing. Well, I did 20 years ago. But now, is not then.

I am reminded of the epic words spoken by Ash. The character Bruce Campbell played in the Evil Dead movie series.

“Hail to the king, baby.” - Ashley Joanna “Ash” Williams, Army of Darkness.

That’s how I feel. Over confident, arrogant, and no clue what is going on. Idiotic perfection at its best.

(wink)